Things have been going great. I am down about 15lbs and my scrubs are fitting more and more like they should every day! I have had some days where we might bend the rules slightly, but not have a total derailment. The support group on facebook is in one word AWESOME! I have never posted any "skin showing" photos previously, but I was moved to do so in the group by other people. We should not be ashamed of who are currently, but we know there is room for improvement that we are for a lack of better descriptive way - hungry for it. Each of as person have what it takes to be successful, its a matter of tapping into that part of yourself - which for some is harder than others.
Again, I keep learning new things every time I do a challenge. I find more and things to shed, things that once held such grave importance (that includes people sometimes) really have no bearing on draw on my life and its time to shed those items. I usually start by cleaning items away vs people, just because I NEVER follow my gut instinct, which I shouldn't question it. I allow people 3 chances, but once that 3rd chance is up - I'm done with you. I will no longer keep up one sided relationships and do all the work for a "friendship/relationship" that doesn't really having any substance or validity in my life. With all that being said, we cleaned out our garage and took a ton of stuff to the local donation area that uses things for women and children in shelters. I will no longer give things to family members that have the means to apparently buy new things that I myself cannot even have the luxury of doing.
I am currently having an inner battle with myself over my job. I am under a ton of stress to get all things done - and I feel like I do a pretty good job of keeping up with it all, but one procedure, and then its like I am 50 steps behind where I thought I was. Its always good to have that reassurance to give yourself, but considering this a total new field for me - I do not have that reassurance to give myself - just mostly doubt!
In recent days, I have had to have several uncomfortable conversations with people. Not really uncomfortable for me, but mostly for the other parties involved, which is sometimes worse. One was ending a relationship with a dental rep that really did a lot for us - believe me, I was super grateful to have had him for the set up, but like I tell every rep - I am needy, you are going to have to spend time with me and I'll have thousand questions. Most of you know, I am super up front - sometimes too frank, but I don't want them to think its going to be a breeze account and then getting into it, its farther from the truth than they could have every imagined. Now we a new rep (with in the same company) and he is better, but he is no Erik! I wanted to have my rep back from LA, just because we have worked together for several years at my other office and he knows just how demanding I am and what I expect from a Rep. But the RM here said it was not possible since he is in a different region. The other conversation I had to have was with my boss. It was something that I had wanted to tell him since my BIL root canal. I could tell his feeling where hurt, but he wanted to know it all, so he got it all for sure. I really miss what I did at the other office, but I know unless several people to move on - things would never be the way they needed to be. Things just never work out as optimally as you think they are going to be and nothing is ever the pure definition of perfect - perfect is what you make it to be - which is imperfect in itself.
Tomorrow we are leaving to go and visit Luis' Dad and family. we are going to take a day and see the city and (Philly) and then the next days we will be in Allentown visiting. We got hotel rooms this trip and it will be longer than 24 hours - the last time we went up there was a total wreck with travel and it was only for 24 hours - I'll never do that again for anything!
Wish us safe travels and positive vibes for the trip! This will also be the first time his dad and the rest of them see us since we have lost the weight. We shall see how that all goes!
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