Getting off track - finding your way back.

These last few weeks have been super stressful.  In the entire time we  have been on this transformation/weight loss journey I never cheated and never lost site of my goal or faith - until 2 weeks ago.

I am ashamed to even tell this, because I have been so strong all this time.  I let work stress get to me, let it penetrate and ruin my mind set and faith.  A person can only take so much beating from an individual who is completely and utterly out of touch with how the real world works.  Luis an I both ate terribly - something I reverted to that I haven't eaten or even thought of for 2 years.  And we just pitiful with it. All these feelings that I thought would be battled out - and I thought I had - some resurfaced. Once the mental stress of work broke down the barrier of faith - the sadness of dealing with our infertility reared its ugly face.

As luck would have it - the other doctor in the office needed help organizing and cleaning his office - which took a ton of stress off of me physically.  Also, gave me a break from my mental processing of work and personal life.  We have a huge complicated case I am helping with in the morning and I have been in the process of planning with all the doctors involved so that also helps me.

I have to be strong for Luis and myself.  I was relying on him - without telling him that I needed him to be strong for my decision process about food and what not. What I had forgotten was I was his strength and accountability.  The only way I am going to be successful in this battle is to get us both back on track and on our feet.  The path is there and we are both going to get back on it.  I never want to see that negativity again, and if that means that I have to make a lot of changes in my life concerning where and who I spend the bulk of my day with it - so be it.  No situation or money is worth my health and mental well being.

We traveled to Louisiana on Friday/Saturday to get the bed that we left in the attic of our old house.  The woman who purchased it from us is just a great person.  I was so happy to have gotten it back and she showed us all around the house and what she had done with the house.  You can really tell that she just loves the house - and that is great!  I got to catch up with Karen, Mickey, Carolyn, Hailey, Brent and Jenni, Jeremeh and Angie, and the Hanks.  We had a great trip and had a great time catching up with people.

Off to bed I must go!  Tomorrow will be a long and physically taxing day!